Slowing the Decision Down

By Dana Ehrlich, AI Certified Real Estate Agent™ & Los Angeles Senior Real Estate Specialist

There's a certain kind of stress that shows up when people feel like they need to make a decision right now. I see it all the time. Someone calls me about selling their home, and within the first five minutes, I can hear the tension in their voice. They're worried they're already behind. They think they've waited too long. They feel like the clock is ticking and they need to act immediately.

Here's what I've learned after years of helping people through real estate transitions: that urgency is almost never as real as it feels.

Most of the stress I see comes from the feeling that a decision has to be made immediately. But when people pause long enough to understand their options, the right path usually becomes clearer. Real clarity doesn't come from speed. It comes from asking better questions and giving yourself permission to think.

The Trap of Immediate Decisions

We live in a world that rewards speed. Fast responses. Quick turnarounds. Instant answers. And sometimes that works fine for small, low-stakes choices.

But selling a home? Downsizing after decades in the same house? Navigating a probate situation or figuring out what to do with an inherited property? These aren't small decisions. They carry emotional weight, financial consequences, and family dynamics that can't be untangled in a single afternoon.

When you try to rush through decisions like these, a few things tend to happen:

You accept the first solution that comes to mind. Researchers call this "premature closure." Your brain wants to resolve the discomfort of uncertainty, so it latches onto whatever answer appears first, even if it's not the best one.

You miss important alternatives. There might be three or four different ways to approach your situation, but if you're racing to a finish line, you won't take the time to explore them.

You make decisions based on fear instead of information. Fear is a terrible advisor. It narrows your thinking and pushes you toward choices that feel safe in the moment but don't serve you in the long run.

The irony is that rushing often creates more stress, not less. You end up second-guessing yourself, wondering if you made the right call, and sometimes dealing with consequences that could have been avoided.

Why Slowing Down Works

Taking time doesn't mean being indecisive. It doesn't mean procrastinating or avoiding the hard stuff. It means being intentional about how you approach a big decision.

When you slow down, you give yourself space to:

• Gather the information you actually need. Not endless research that leads to analysis paralysis, but focused questions that help you understand your specific situation.

• Consider your real priorities. What matters most to you? Is it maximizing the sale price? Minimizing hassle? Staying close to family? Keeping peace among siblings? These priorities shape everything else.

• Get input from people who know what they're talking about. Whether that's a trusted advisor, a family member, or a professional who's been through this process hundreds of times, outside perspectives can reveal things you might miss on your own.

• Let your thinking evolve. Sometimes you reach an "almost final" decision, and then something shifts. A new piece of information comes in. A conversation changes your perspective. That's normal. Good decisions often come from feedback loops, not straight lines.

Asking Better Questions

One of the most powerful things you can do when facing a big decision is to ask better questions. Not more questions, better ones.

Here's what I mean. A lot of people come to me asking, "What's my home worth?" That's a reasonable question, but it's not the most important one. The more useful question is usually, "What are my options, and which one fits my situation?"

Because the answer to "What's my home worth?" depends heavily on how you sell it, when you sell it, and what trade-offs you're willing to make.

For example:

• If you want speed and simplicity, a cash offer might make the most sense, even if the price is a bit lower.

• If you want to maximize your return and you have time, a traditional listing with some strategic updates could be the better path.

• If you need to buy your next home before selling, a trade-in program might solve a problem you didn't even know had a solution.

• If the house needs work but you don't have the funds or energy for renovations, there are programs that let you renovate now and pay later from the sale proceeds.

See how the "right" answer changes based on what you're actually trying to accomplish? That's why slowing down matters. You need time to figure out what you're really asking.

Giving Yourself Permission to Think

This might be the hardest part for a lot of people. Giving yourself permission to think. To not have the answer yet. To sit with uncertainty for a little while longer.

We're taught that decisiveness is a virtue. And it can be. But there's a difference between being decisive and being reactive. Decisive means you've thought it through and you're ready to commit. Reactive means you're just trying to make the discomfort go away.

Here's a simple framework that might help:

Set a realistic timeline. When does this decision actually need to be made? Not when it feels like it should be made, but when it truly needs to happen. Work backward from there.

Block time to think. This sounds obvious, but it's rare. Most people make major decisions in the gaps between other things, distracted and tired. Give yourself focused time to really think it through.

Talk it out. Some people process by talking. Find someone who will listen without judgment and let you work through your thoughts out loud.

Write it down. Other people process by writing. Putting your options on paper can make them feel more concrete and easier to compare.

Sleep on it. There's real wisdom in this old advice. Your brain continues to process information while you sleep. Decisions often look different in the morning.

What This Looks Like in Real Estate

In my work with sellers in Los Angeles, I've seen how powerful it can be when someone gives themselves room to breathe.

A few months ago, I worked with a family navigating a probate situation after losing their mother. They came to me feeling overwhelmed, thinking they needed to sell immediately. But when we slowed down and looked at their options, they realized they had more time than they thought. We ended up taking a slightly different approach that gave them better results and a lot less stress.

That's the kind of outcome that becomes possible when you're not operating from panic.

If you're in a similar situation, whether you're downsizing, dealing with an inherited property, or just trying to figure out your next move, I'd encourage you to resist the pressure to rush. Take a breath. Ask questions. Understand your options.

The right path usually becomes clearer when you give it the space to emerge.

Key Takeaways

• Feeling like you have to decide immediately is usually an illusion, and it creates unnecessary stress.

• Rushing leads to premature closure, missed alternatives, and fear-based decisions.

• Slowing down allows you to gather real information, clarify your priorities, and get valuable input.

• Better questions lead to better answers, so focus on understanding your options, not just getting a number.

• Give yourself permission to think, set a timeline, block focused time, and let your decision evolve.

If you're facing a real estate decision and you're not sure where to start, I'm happy to talk it through with you. No pressure, no rush. Just a conversation to help you understand what's possible.

Schedule a call whenever you're ready. I'll be here.